Men Health
Resources
Overview
According to Masters and Johnson, at least 25 to 30 percent of people in their 60s have intercourse at least weekly...and that's not weakly.
There are normal changes in a man's sexual function as he gets older, but this does not always include impotence and does not mean he is going to lose his erectile ability (in other words, you don't wear out your penis.) These changes come on slowly.
Most men and women are able to adjust to these changes and still have a perfectly satisfactory sexual relationships. Although a man of 60 may not be able to run a mile as fast as when he was 18, he should be able to cover the distance and may even enjoy the scenery more. The same goes for his wife, especially since she may appreciate the increased ease with which he can delay ejaculation.
The inability to "get hard"
Worry is the first time you can't do it a second time; panic is the second time you can't do it the first time.
Although many sexual topics are now "out of the closet," impotence is still a subject that arouses fear and anxiety in many men and women.
This emotional reaction is further strengthened by the lack of knowledge on the part of patients, their partners, and health care professionals. Most people were never taught about the erection process in school, let alone given accurate information from other sources. Much of the knowledge about penile anatomy and physiology has only become available in the last five years.
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Ignorance, fear, a lack of information, embarrassment, and anxiety provide a fertile breeding ground for sexual problems. While some problems related to the ability of the penis to become hard and ready for sex are tied to physical problems, some cases of impotence are linked to psychological issues.
Even when impotence is tied to physical problems, there can be psychological underpinnings that must be addressed with successful treatment of the physical causes. For example, many couples have serious emotional reactions to the loss of erectile ability and to what they believe it represents, and have adjusted their relationships to explain and compensate for their emotional problems. When treatment of the impotence is successful, there still are the underlying relationship problems that need attention.
Our goal at the Male Health Center is to restore a healthy physical and emotional outlook to the patient and his partner and therefore improve their ultimate satisfaction with successful treatment of impotence.
In order to achieve this goal, it is important to:
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Educate: explain in detail the mechanism of erections and the many causes of problems; dispel any myths that may exist concerning erections.
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Try to get the partner involved in the process. Such participation enhances communication and can identify sources of stress and anxiety for everyone.
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Perform accurate diagnosis of the physical and emotional aspects of the erection problem.
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Educate partners on alternatives for treatment and the expected outcome and risks of each treatment.
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Help the couple define a plan for rebuilding their sexual and emotional relationship based on their own particular physical and emotional circumstances.
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Continue to support couples with counseling in adjusting to their new situations and reevaluate them in case of future difficulties.
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Prevention: address factors that can either now or in the future complicate or cause erectile problems such as smoking or high cholesterol.
More important facts
- Most men experience erection problems at some point in their lives due to job, alcohol, stress or mental problems.
- Past sexual practices, including masturbation, do NOT cause impotence.
- An occasional problem does not mean a man will develop a chronic condition.
- Physical factors can directly affect a man's ability to get and maintain an erection.
- The mind is very powerful and a man with or without any physical problem can sabotage his erections just by worrying about his ability to perform.
The emotions involved in impotence
Many men view impotence as a real challenge to their self-esteem. Furthermore, many men believe a number of myths surrounding potency problems. Some men may fear they themselves have caused their erection problem by past actions such as infidelity or masturbation.
A man may have feelings of guilt because he no longer fulfills what he views as his role as a man. It is also common for a man to fear that impotence is the first sign of his physical decline toward old age and death. Most men, even when they admit there is a problem, are reluctant to ask for help.
What some men think about sex:
- Men shouldn't express certain feelings.
- Sex is a performance.
- A man must orchestrate sex.
- A man always wants and is always ready to have sex.
- All physical contact must lead to sex.
- Sex equals intercourse.
- Sex requires an erection.
- Good sex is increasing excitement terminated only by orgasm.
- Sex should be natural and spontaneous.
